Well, I feel like things are going better than they were last week. It is crazy to look over at my ticker and see that it says there are only three days left!
My appointment last week went well. The doctor said that I was 80% effaced and dilated to a 1+, so that is a little bit of improvement from before. She also stripped my membranes, in the hopes that would help move things along. She encouraged me to do a lot of walking and of course, have s.ex, which is the last thing on my mind. :) At least something I am doing has been paying off, because I lost my mucous plug on Friday. It is really good to know that things are progressing and my body is getting ready.
Part of me just wishes that I would go into labor, but part of me still feels like this has gone by so quickly and that I need to cherish every last minute. I hope that I will have the opportunity to experience pregnancy again in the future, but I know that I can't count on it.
Going forward, I have another appointment this Friday, which is my actual due date. Last week, my doctor told me that they typically won't do an induction until the baby is a week overdue, so hopefully that means no later than a week from this Friday. I have been joking with my family that Jumper is going to wait to be born until then so that she can join our family's September birthday party - between me and two sisters, there are three birthdays within four days (September 10, 12, and 13).
In other news, I just received a really sad phone call while I was typing this post. I got a phone call from K's (J's birthmom) mom, who said she wanted to let me know that K has relapsed on drugs and that she wanted to warn us so that we could take adequate steps to protect our family. We talked for a while, and it broke my heart to hear about the choices that K has made. I have been thinking about her so much lately, and perhaps this is why. Her mom did say several times that she has so much peace knowing that J is with us and part of our family, and it scares her to think about where he would be if K hadn't placed him for adoption. I love J so much, and it is horrible to think of what type of environment he could be living in or what kind of life he could have. I also still have such a love for K for the decision that she made to place J with us...I wish there was something I could do, but I don't think there is anything other than praying for her. At her mom's recommendation, I think that DH and I will likely stop e-mailing K and making a few other changes just to be on the safe side, but we need to talk about it some more.
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Still Here
I know this post might rub some people the wrong way, so I would recommend NOT reading it if you are having a hard time right now...
I am 38 weeks 4 days right now, but I am ready to be done. I have really enjoyed my pregnancy, and it hasn't been until recently that I have started to feel more uncomfortable and miserable. I keep telling myself that I need to just be grateful and enjoy this ride for as long as it lasts, but it is getting hard.
For the past 10 days or so, I have had contractions pretty much every day. Sometimes it is just a few contractions, and those are manageable, but there are also days when I will have them for hours. On both Saturday and Sunday nights, I had them so badly and they were starting to get close enough together that DH and I were thinking that it was time to head to the hospital...and then they started to fade away. I am sure that these false labor contractions serve some purpose, but it is getting old to have them and feel so exhausted after, and then have it all be for nothing. Add to it that the worst ones usually come at night, so I am not really sleeping.
I think that one of the hardest things has also been that it is getting hard for me to take care of J. He had a pretty bad cold last week that we had to deal with, but now that he is back to normal, he is all over the place...and sometimes I physically can't keep up with him. It makes me feel like such a bad mom to know that it is getting so hard for me to take care of him. I know he won't remember any of this, but it kind of feels like he got the short end of the stick in regards to his first year of life. I am sure that he didn't ask to get a mom who has no energy to play with him or do fun things with him.
I go to the doctor again on Thursday and I am hoping that she will give me some good news. When I went to my appointment last week, she had been called to do an emergency C-section, so I had to see the nurse. The good news from that appointment was that I was measuring a half week ahead, but the bad news was that they didn't check to see if I had effaced or dilated more.
I know that my due date is next week and even if I do go over, the end isn't too far away...I am just ready for it to be the end now! I am so anxious to meet this little girl and enjoy our family of four!
I am 38 weeks 4 days right now, but I am ready to be done. I have really enjoyed my pregnancy, and it hasn't been until recently that I have started to feel more uncomfortable and miserable. I keep telling myself that I need to just be grateful and enjoy this ride for as long as it lasts, but it is getting hard.
For the past 10 days or so, I have had contractions pretty much every day. Sometimes it is just a few contractions, and those are manageable, but there are also days when I will have them for hours. On both Saturday and Sunday nights, I had them so badly and they were starting to get close enough together that DH and I were thinking that it was time to head to the hospital...and then they started to fade away. I am sure that these false labor contractions serve some purpose, but it is getting old to have them and feel so exhausted after, and then have it all be for nothing. Add to it that the worst ones usually come at night, so I am not really sleeping.
I think that one of the hardest things has also been that it is getting hard for me to take care of J. He had a pretty bad cold last week that we had to deal with, but now that he is back to normal, he is all over the place...and sometimes I physically can't keep up with him. It makes me feel like such a bad mom to know that it is getting so hard for me to take care of him. I know he won't remember any of this, but it kind of feels like he got the short end of the stick in regards to his first year of life. I am sure that he didn't ask to get a mom who has no energy to play with him or do fun things with him.
I go to the doctor again on Thursday and I am hoping that she will give me some good news. When I went to my appointment last week, she had been called to do an emergency C-section, so I had to see the nurse. The good news from that appointment was that I was measuring a half week ahead, but the bad news was that they didn't check to see if I had effaced or dilated more.
I know that my due date is next week and even if I do go over, the end isn't too far away...I am just ready for it to be the end now! I am so anxious to meet this little girl and enjoy our family of four!
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
37 Weeks 4 Days
Still here, just keeping busy taking care of J and getting ready for Jumper's arrival. Just a head's up, but this post is pretty random!
As of last week's doctor's appointment, nothing had changed as far as effacement or dilation. I wasn't too surprised and had pretty much planned on not having any progress. So many people keep telling me that "there is no way" I'll make it to September, but I don't want to get my hopes up or plan on it.
On Sunday night, I started having some irregular contractions. They lasted for a couple hours on Sunday and then they came back yesterday afternoon. On Sunday, they weren't too bad because I was able to go to bed and sleep, so I didn't feel too tired from them. Yesterday, they started while I was at work and lasted for almost 4 hours. Part of me really wanted to just leave work and go to bed, but part of me knew that they weren't legitimate, so I might as well keep getting paid while I was feeling miserable. By the time they finally subsided, I was exhausted! We had to go to a family birthday dinner after work, and everyone kept saying how tired I looked and asking if I was okay. I guess one nice thing was that there were plenty of people around to help entertain J, so I just got to sit back and rest for a while. I have had a few more this afternoon, but they are still really irregular and they haven't been as strong as they were yesterday. It is so exciting to get to this point and know that Jumper really will be here soon, but it also makes me so nervous! I am getting nervous about the actual labor, but also the thought of having a newborn and J to take care. It makes me tired to just think about it.
Besides that, I am trying to just enjoy the last few weeks of this pregnancy and enjoy having time with just J. A few weeks ago, my mom watched J so that DH and I could get away over night...it was a much needed break, and I think everyone realized that it is going to be a long time before we get to do anything like that again. I also went with my family and took J up to a nearby lake for a picnic and walk. He LOVED being by the lake and looking at the water. After, I went out with my mom, sisters, cousin, and aunt for a girls night...pedicures and dinner. It was so nice!
For the most part, I feel like we are pretty prepared for Jumper, even though there are still some things that need to get purchased. I also really want to get my house nice and clean, but I just haven't seemed to have the energy to get it done these past few days. I know I need to just make myself do it while J is napping, but I really just want to take advantage of that quiet time and lay down myself...
As of last week's doctor's appointment, nothing had changed as far as effacement or dilation. I wasn't too surprised and had pretty much planned on not having any progress. So many people keep telling me that "there is no way" I'll make it to September, but I don't want to get my hopes up or plan on it.
On Sunday night, I started having some irregular contractions. They lasted for a couple hours on Sunday and then they came back yesterday afternoon. On Sunday, they weren't too bad because I was able to go to bed and sleep, so I didn't feel too tired from them. Yesterday, they started while I was at work and lasted for almost 4 hours. Part of me really wanted to just leave work and go to bed, but part of me knew that they weren't legitimate, so I might as well keep getting paid while I was feeling miserable. By the time they finally subsided, I was exhausted! We had to go to a family birthday dinner after work, and everyone kept saying how tired I looked and asking if I was okay. I guess one nice thing was that there were plenty of people around to help entertain J, so I just got to sit back and rest for a while. I have had a few more this afternoon, but they are still really irregular and they haven't been as strong as they were yesterday. It is so exciting to get to this point and know that Jumper really will be here soon, but it also makes me so nervous! I am getting nervous about the actual labor, but also the thought of having a newborn and J to take care. It makes me tired to just think about it.
Besides that, I am trying to just enjoy the last few weeks of this pregnancy and enjoy having time with just J. A few weeks ago, my mom watched J so that DH and I could get away over night...it was a much needed break, and I think everyone realized that it is going to be a long time before we get to do anything like that again. I also went with my family and took J up to a nearby lake for a picnic and walk. He LOVED being by the lake and looking at the water. After, I went out with my mom, sisters, cousin, and aunt for a girls night...pedicures and dinner. It was so nice!
For the most part, I feel like we are pretty prepared for Jumper, even though there are still some things that need to get purchased. I also really want to get my house nice and clean, but I just haven't seemed to have the energy to get it done these past few days. I know I need to just make myself do it while J is napping, but I really just want to take advantage of that quiet time and lay down myself...
Thursday, August 4, 2011
35 Weeks 6 Day
Wow, I can't believe I am already so close to 36 weeks! I still feel like time is going by really quickly, but I will admit that I am getting more ready for this little girl to make her appearance. I haven't been too nervous about her birth until just recently. Before, I always figured that it wasn't going to be a big deal because I already know what it is like to have a new baby, plus I still remember my OB rotations during school. Then, it hit me...this is going to be a lot different this time. This time, it is ME giving birth...this time, I will hopefully be breastfeeding, and that is a whole different ballgame compared to formula feeding. Needless to say, I am starting to feel a bit more nervous, especially since everyone loves to share their "worse case scenario" stories.
I went to my 36 week appointment today, and things are progressing really well. I am already 70% effaced and am almost dilated to a one. I guess that explains why I have been feeling a lot more pressure in my hips and tailbone lately. Plus, Jumper is head down, which is great news! The doctor said that at this point it is too soon to tell if I will make it to 40 weeks or end up going over, but I can only hope that things keep progressing as well as they have been.
It is kind of crazy to think that in *hopefully* less than a month, I am going to have two kids! Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine being in this situation a year ago. I know that life is going to be crazy busy, and it is definitely going to be interesting to care for a newborn while taking care of a 10 month old, but I know it will be worth it. I am just getting super excited to meet this little lady!
I went to my 36 week appointment today, and things are progressing really well. I am already 70% effaced and am almost dilated to a one. I guess that explains why I have been feeling a lot more pressure in my hips and tailbone lately. Plus, Jumper is head down, which is great news! The doctor said that at this point it is too soon to tell if I will make it to 40 weeks or end up going over, but I can only hope that things keep progressing as well as they have been.
It is kind of crazy to think that in *hopefully* less than a month, I am going to have two kids! Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine being in this situation a year ago. I know that life is going to be crazy busy, and it is definitely going to be interesting to care for a newborn while taking care of a 10 month old, but I know it will be worth it. I am just getting super excited to meet this little lady!
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