Nursery Advice Needed

I need some advice for what to do for the baby's nursery! As of right now, we are having Jumper share a room with J. My sister is living in our spare room and unless we get around to finishing our basement, there isn't another place to put her. Plus, the two kids are going to need so much of the same stuff, I figure that for right now, it makes sense for them to share.

Anyway, I didn't have an opportunity to do much decorating before we got J since we had such little notice. I bought this JJ Cole bedding set, and figured that I would actually decorate the nursery when things calmed down.



Well, then I found out that I was pg, and figured that it might be best to wait and decorate until I knew if we were having a boy or girl. I didn't think it made much sense to do a boy room if there was going to be a little lady joining us.

So now I am trying to figure out the best way to decorate. I really don't want to have to buy another crib set for J, but I am having a hard time figuring out/finding a good set that will go with it for Jumper. I think that J's set is a little too masculine to use for Jumper, but what do you guys think? Any suggestions? I have thought that maybe if I could find some bedding that matched, I could take the circle theme from J's bedding and do some vinyl art, but that is as far as I have gotten. I would LOVE any advice/suggestions that anyone has.

A Slight Twist

Ever since we found out about our chromosome testing results back in the beginning of May, we have been waiting to find out if the PGD testing would even work for us. I started doing my own research, and between that and the fact that it was taking the lab so long to make a decision, I concluded that it probably just wasn't a good option.

Yesterday, I got an e-mail from our genetic counselor. She said that the testing would be very complicated, but doable. But, how doable is it for us to actually get healthy and viable embryos? After I received this e-mail, I seriously started stressing out - to the point that I was making myself sick (I thought I was going to throw-up while at the gym). What if we jumped the gun and made our decision too soon? What if we still could have biological kids this way? What if we tried IVF? What if???

Even if our insurance will pay for the testing (in some cases they will), DH and I unfortunately just don't have the funds to pay for IVF, especially if we don't have good odds of getting a baby out of it. We talked about it last night and agreed that even though we aren't changing our plans, we are still going to meet with the counselor to learn all that we can.

Praying For a Miracle

I got a call from the genetic counselor this afternoon...the results are in, and I did inherit the chromosome translocation. Basically, part of my #2 chromosome is attached to my #5 chromosome. The genetic counselor said that while it isn't impossible for us to have a baby, this type of chromosome abnormality will make doing the pregenetic diagnosis (PGD) a little more tricky. She got some more information from me and said that she is going to talk to the lab and a doctor who specializes in this kind of stuff. When I get back into town, we will meet with her and hopefully they will be able to predict the likelihood of getting a healthy embryo. She said that it will hopefully be greater than 5%. 5%...not to mention the 50% chance that it would even implant and I would have a baby.

At this point I am just feeling really overwhelmed. I think that it is all still sinking in. It is nice to finally have an answer for our situation, but this isn't the answer I was hoping for. The counselor kept saying that at least we know that my mom was able to have five healthy children, so not to give up hope. I am guessing that our options are either to do the IVF with PGD and hope that we get a healthy embryo, do embryo adoption, or go forward with normal adoption. We will find out more when we meet with her in a few weeks, but at this point I think it will take a miracle for me to have a biological child.

At least I know that I don't need to waste any more money on birth control.

Waiting

I decided to POAS today...and got a BFN. So now I am just waiting for AF to arrive. Part of me is trying to be hopeful that maybe I just tested too soon, since I haven't had any spotting at all. I have been cramping for the past few days though, so I really don't want to get my hopes up too much. If I still haven't seen AF by Monday, I will test again.

I sent an e-mail to the RE's office to see what they want to do this cycle. Every part of my plan hinges on getting the chrosome test results back...and those will come any day now. My tentative plan is to do another cycle on Clomid. I am NOT going to temp this month and I am going to try an OPK instead of my CBEFM. I also ordered some Preseed...we usually don't really need it, but sometimes DH wishes that we could use lube, so I figure it can't hurt.

If the test results show that I have the chromosome abnormality, I guess we will be going in to talk to the RE about IVF. I honestly don't know if DH and I will be financially able to go down that road. I started looking into 'medical tourism' - meaning we would go to another country for IVF, but that creates a whole other list of questions.

So, for the meanwhile, we are just holding tight and hoping for the best.

CD 1, "The Talk", and My Plan

Yesterday was CD 1. AF arrived right on schedule...I suppose that I should be grateful that at least one part of my reproductive system is working right! I haven't been too upset at all about this CD 1. I think it is because I just never was really "feeling it" this cycle and because I decided to POAS.

On Sunday, DH and I had the adoption talk. I told him that I didn't want to stop TTC on our own and I hadn't given up hope of having biological children, but that I also wanted to explore the adoption option. He was initially very resistant, saying that it was too soon and he didn't want to "put his name in that basket" just yet. He also said that he thought we couldn't afford adoption, but then I reminded him that our insurance will actually contribute much more towards adoption expenses than infertility. We talked about it a lot more yesterday, and we decided that we will tentatively look into it. Meaning, we are planning on attending an orientation-type meeting at the agency we know we would want to use.

So, this is my plan:

1. I am still working on getting the insurance to cover the chromosome testing. We are filing an appeal this week, but who knows how long it will take to get that to go through.
2. While we are waiting on the insurance, my RE is letting my try Clomid this cycle. This will be my first cycle on Clomid. Any advice, suggestions, or warnings???
3. I will call the agency and see when the next meeting will be.

I am feeling pretty good about things this month. I am hoping that maybe the Clomid will do the trick for us this month (or maybe just a miracle will happen). If not, I still feel like we are heading in the right direction!

Second Thoughts

First, thank you to everyone who has visited my blog from ICLW week! This has been the first time I participated, and I have really enjoyed having you visit my blog and getting to know more of you.

Anyway, I am having second thoughts about whether it is time to see an RE. When I first started thinking about going to one, I felt excited by it because it meant I was being proactive and doing all that I can to get KU. Then, I started thinking about it more and I did a little bit of research, and for some reason, it just didn't feel right. Yesterday, I got an e-mail back from a friend who I had asked about her RE experiences. She highly recommended the doctor that she had seen and recommended just going to an RE rather than relying on the OB/GYN. So, that made me start leaning back to making an appointment. I am not sure if it started to feel okay again because she was able to recommend someone so highly, but I feel like I am being torn between the two sides. I can't think of any real reason to NOT go, other than it didn't feel like the right decision before I got her e-mail. I know that I don't have to decide right away, but I hate feeling like I am in limbo. I talked to DH about it, and he said that based on what my friend says, we should see the RE, but he will respect my decision either way.

On a side note, FF says that today is 3 DPO. I think that it probably about right, but I still feel like I have some O pain, which I just don't get. Why does it stick around for so long?

The Game Plan

I feel like I have done a lot of thinking in the 24 hours since my appointment. DH and I talked a lot, and I also talked to my mom and another friend struggling with getting KU. As of right now, this is my game plan, although details are subject to change:

1. I will make sure DH and I BD every other night from CD 8 - CD 20.
2. I will keep taking my meds (prenatal, progesterone).
3. I will go see my family doctor for a physical to make sure I am healthy and everything is okay.
4. I will keep trying to eat better and exercise so that I know I am doing everything possible to be as healthy as possible.
5. I will get a second opinion (not sure if I should find an RE or just talk to another OB) and ask about additional testing.
6. I will follow-up with my doctor in three months if I am not KU yet.

I feel okay with this plan, but I just wish that step 5 wasn't necessary. Hopefully I will get some answers!