Friday, April 30, 2010
I immediately called the genetic counselor that we are working with and left her a message. I am hoping that somehow, some way, she will be able to track the labs down. Otherwise, it is back to square one. Hopefully, I won't need to go through the entire preauthorization process again. But I really just don't want to have to wait another three weeks to get the results back. I know that in the scheme of things, three weeks isn't that long, but still. This is so frustrating because all of our plans hinge on this one lab test.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
The plan is to start taking Clomid 50mg again tomorrow. There is a small chance that we will try IUI this cycle, but I don't think the timing will work out. We are going out of town on CD 13, which I am assuming would be too early for an IUI, right? Plus, depending on the test results, that could all be irrelevant and go out the window, anyway.
For the meanwhile, I am just enjoying my less restrictive cycle and hoping that this could be our month. I am feeling more optimistic than normal this time...not really sure why. Normally, I always have this "I'm just not feeling it" feeling in my gut, but now I am more excited. Maybe it is the Clomid, or maybe it is the fact that we are going on vacation. But for a change, it is nice to feel optimistic and hopeful, rather than like I am just going through the motions.
On another note, I got the sweetest e-mail from DH's younger brother yesterday. His brother, T, is living out of the country right now, so he tries to send a weekly e-mail to all of the family to keep us updated on his life. In yesterday's e-mail he included a little note for DH and me which basically said that he wanted us to know that he is praying for us and our kid situation every night and that he believes it will happen for us. I thought it was really sweet that a 20 year old kid would not only be doing that, but also send me that note. It was so thoughtful and encouraging to remember that we aren't in this alone. Not only are there so many other couples in this situation, but our family is so supportive and are our biggest cheerleaders.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
I think that I am also really stressing about the upcoming test results. Whatever these results say are going to have a HUGE impact on our course of action. I know that we will still be able to have kids if I have the problem, but the thought of it gives me so much anxiety and just stresses me out. My insurance has a website where you can check your lab results/medical information, and I keep checking it to see if anything was posted, but nothing yet. I should have my results by Friday, but I have a feeling that this is going to be a long week.
So I ended up going to the infertility conference yesterday. I went with my friend, M, who has been struggling with IF for 3+ years. I am glad that I went, even though I wouldn't say that I learned a ton of new information. A lot of what was presented seemed somewhat straight forward, but I did learn a few things, plus it was just good to go with a fellow IF sufferer and get that support. Some of the doctors talked about IF basics, natural methods to improve your fertility, and the emotional aspects of IF. If you have the opportunity to go to a conference in your community, I would recommend checking it out, even if it is just to get another source of support.
Friday, April 23, 2010
I sent an e-mail to the RE's office to see what they want to do this cycle. Every part of my plan hinges on getting the chrosome test results back...and those will come any day now. My tentative plan is to do another cycle on Clomid. I am NOT going to temp this month and I am going to try an OPK instead of my CBEFM. I also ordered some Preseed...we usually don't really need it, but sometimes DH wishes that we could use lube, so I figure it can't hurt.
If the test results show that I have the chromosome abnormality, I guess we will be going in to talk to the RE about IVF. I honestly don't know if DH and I will be financially able to go down that road. I started looking into 'medical tourism' - meaning we would go to another country for IVF, but that creates a whole other list of questions.
So, for the meanwhile, we are just holding tight and hoping for the best.
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
In cycle news, I got a stellar temperature this morning...99.04! However, I am not getting my hopes up because I also think I might be getting sick. I have had a really sore throat and some other respiratory symptoms, so we'll see what happens. I am either 12DPO or 9DPO depending on how you want to interpret my temps. I am not relying on FF to interpet my chart this month. I figure that I will wait and see what my body decides to do the rest of the week, and then maybe I will test Saturday or Sunday.
Also, a BIG THANK YOU to my April Secret Pal! She sent me this super cute bracelet that has charms saying "achieve", "success", and "believe". I love it, it made my day, and it fits perfectly. Thank you so much!!!
Monday, April 19, 2010
Anyway...I originally found a pattern for a rag quilt to make for L. The only problem is that all of the fabric that I like is quite expensive...meaning this blanket would cost much more than I am willing to spend on her. Other options that I have thought of are to crochet a baby blanket, just make a receiving blanket or bibs, or buy something from her registry. I just can't decide what to do...part of me is leaning towards crocheting a blanket, part of me thinks I should find another pattern, and another part says to just do something more simple.
If you have any ideas or want to help me with my decision, check out my poll or leave a comment. I would love to get some feedback!
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Thursday, April 15, 2010
I signed DH and me up to attend an infertility conference that is being held in Salt Lake next Saturday. One of my friends referred me to it and I thought it sounded interesting. It is in association with the National Infertility Awareness Week and Resolve, so hopefully it should be good. If anyone has been to a conference like this before, did you feel like it was worth your while? Would you recommend going?
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Monday, April 12, 2010
The frustrating thing is that my CBEFM still hasn't shown a peak. It never peaked last month, so this could be the second month in a row that it missed it. I guess it is possible I still haven't O'd yet...but I think that I did. My O pains have gone away and I haven't had as much EWCM. My temps haven't been really conclusive, but I also got up super early this morning, so I don't feel that today's was super accurate. So, while I am hoping that the Clomid works this time and I end up KU, I am also thinking about trying an OPK in addition to the CBEFM. I have heard the Clear Blue Easy OPKs are good, but does anyone have any recommendations?
So yesterday during church our Bishop got up and started talking about how he and his wife have struggled with IF. He said that they got their twins through IVF (which I knew) and that there other daughter was a miracle baby. He talked about how they would really like to have a fourth child, and that the process of going through IF has really taught him and his wife about how aware God is of their family. Of course I ended up crying, but I thought it was kind of cool how he would be so open and talk about this struggle. A few minutes later, another lady got up and talked about how she gave birth a few weeks ago to her son who had died in-utero. At that point, I got really choked up and started crying even more. I don't really know this person (I just know who she is), but it struck me about how common of a problem having children is. Most of us grow up thinking that we will be able to have as many babies as we want and that they will come when we want them. Instead, so many of us are faced with this struggle...it doesn't discriminate.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
As a reminder...My RE recommended that I get tested for a chromosome balance translocation because it runs in my family. My mom has it, and she had eight m/c (although she was able to have five kids). If I have it, there is a good chance that some of my eggs would be affected so badly that it would not be compatible with life. He said that any pg would have a 2/3 chance of m/c. So, if we do have it, he is recommending we go straight to IVF. I am keeping my fingers crossed that the testing comes out all clear. The RE said that he would guess there is a greater than 10% chance that I have it, so I guess the odds are hopefully in my favor that everything comes back okay.
In other news...tomorrow is my first monitoring appointment. I am a little nervous. I wish that there was a way to already know that the Clomid is working - like I could feel my follies growing or something. I have had a few O-type twinges, so hopefully things will go well at tomorrow's appointment!
Monday, April 5, 2010
I didn't end up getting together with my friends on Saturday night, but instead went out with my mom and sisters. We just went to the mall and then out for a treat, but it was still a lot of fun. I don't remember the last time that I went out with all three of my sisters and my mom at the same time, so it was obviously overdue. While we were out shopping, I got these new crop pants from American Eagle.
Everything went well on Easter Sunday. It was a little bit stressful cooking all day and trying so many new recipes, but everything turned out and I think that everyone had a good time. I should have taken some pictures to have proof of my work, but the only proof I am left with now is refrigerated leftovers and sore feet! :)
The best part about buying them was finding out that I have gone down almost two sizes since the last time I bought pants there! It is nice to see that even though the scale isn't changing much, my body is responding to my running and increased time at the gym!
Friday, April 2, 2010
We got our information packet from the adoption agency yesterday. Basically, their charge is 10% of your gross annual income, with a minimum charge of $4000 and a maximum charge of $10,000. DH and I didn't really get a chance to talk about all of the information (my cousin is staying with us for a few days while she visits from CA), but I guess we just need to talk about it and decide whether we are ready to take that plunge, or if we want to just stick with what we are doing now.
I am really looking forward to this weekend. My church has a semi-annual general conference, which is basically when our prophet and other church leaders speak to church members via a broadcast on Saturday and Sunday. I always love getting that spiritual boost. Plus, on Saturday night, there is a meeting that is held just for the guys. My friends and I have started a girls night out tradition during this time, and we always have so much fun! We are still trying to decide on all the details...we will for sure go to dinner, and then either go shopping, see a movie, or get pedicures.
I am also excited for Sunday, because we are having Easter dinner at my house. This is the first holiday that I have ever hosted at my house, so I am a little nervous, but I think it will be fun. My family plus my MIL and her husband are coming over, so we should have a good group. Have a happy Easter!