Saturday, July 10, 2010

Update

I feel like I have TOTALLY slacked on blogging lately...Here is what is going on with us:

First, we finished our preliminary adoption paperwork earlier this week. I went in for my individual interview yesterday, and DH has his on Monday. During my individual interview, the case worker asked me if I had any concerns about anything. I told him that even though I really feel like adoption is the right thing for us, it is sometimes really hard to be around friends that are pg, especially when it happened so easily for them. He assured me that this is normal, that I need to allow myself to grieve, but that when that baby is placed in my arms, I will love that baby just as much as I would have if i carried it for nine months and it won't matter that I didn't.

We are having our homestudy done on Tuesday. I have heard of some people that freak out about this and go overboard with getting their house spotless, but I am not too worried about it. We still need to go to the adoption classes (we are going to an adoption conference at the end of the month). Out case worker said that assuming we get all of our profile information together (pictures, letter to birth parents, etc) within the next few weeks, we should be officially approved the first week of August!

The case worker also said that DH and I have three things working in our favor that will hopefully help us get picked for a baby faster. First, we are young. Second, we don't have any kids. Third, I have a mixed ethnicity (my grandma's family originates from India), so we don't look like every other Caucasian couple out there. Supposedly, this will make our profile more appealing to birth moms if they/their baby is biracial.

In other news, I think that I am going to "out" myself on our family blog. Most of the people that read that blog either know about our m/c or know that we have been TTC, but not everyone. There are a couple of reasons that I think I am going to do this. The biggest reason is that I would like to include our family blog in our adoption profile. Right now, our blog is private and the address includes our first and last names. So, I will need to change our blog address and allow it to be public again. Another reason I am thinking of sharing is just because that way there are no questions from our friends/family about what is going on. I also think that it probably wouldn't hurt for people to know - for all I know, maybe they know someone who is considering placing a baby.

If you have ever outed your IF to family/friends, how did it go? Any suggestions? I know FOR SURE that I will NOT be sharing this blog with them. I still need this as a place to share my own thoughts without anyone IRL passing judgement or getting their feelings hurt.

4 comments:

  1. We have been out to our families since day 1 basically. I even sent them the link to my blog, but they don't read it (for which it turns out I am actually grateful). They don't always know exactly where we are in the process, but they seem afraid to ask how it is going. It's not easy for sure. But I am stoked to hear the news about your adoption proceedings!!! Very very exciting.

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  2. Your home study is moving right along! Don't worry too much about the home visit; I've heard that if your home seems too neat that there may be concern that you're not ready for the disorder that a child can create. Just keep it real.

    I hope that your wait isn't too long to get matched.

    We didn't discuss our IF until we finally got pregnant. It was only then that people started wondering if we had troubles conceiving, or if the pregnancy was an accident. HA! Everyone knows all our business now with the embryo adoption and, for the most part, everyone has been supportive.

    It seems like there is always someone that has to make a hurtful comment, but with good intentions. I guess you just have to take it with a grain of salt.

    Good luck!

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  3. Wow, you all have a lot going on right now. I wish you the best and I hope your family is supportive. Good luck!

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  4. I just found your blog and I wanted to wish you good luck. Our counselor told us that interracial couples match faster as well, and we started noting when other clients of our agency matched. It turned out to be true that mixed race couples did seem to have a shorter wait. I hope things run smooth for you!

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